Baby Talk
by Phoenyxx
Summary: One shot. Minato and Kushina. Kakashi. Baby Naruto. A moment in an alternate universe.


**Baby Talk**

**Warning:** OOC - Must be tacked on because this is purely my own speculation on how Kushina and Minato are characterized.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

--

"How did you manage eight years with this man, Kakashi-kun?"

A shrug. "It's all just a blur now, like what his nickname implies I guess." A pause. "To be frank, Kushina-san, you're the one who married him."

"True…True…But I wasn't aware how _obsessive_ he can be."

"Hey-! Now that's just not fair. You two can't gang up on me like this, right Naru-chan?"

"Guaaaii?"

A string of giggles. "It's alright my sweet dumpling. Your daddy is just under a lot of stress right now!"

"Mama!" A happy squeal and the baby was held securely by the matriarch.

"That's right Naru-chan. Now say 'papa'."

"…Bluuuu!"

Vague, muffled snickers from all parties were heard, with the exception of papa Minato. "Do you have something you want to share, _Kaka-chan_?"

A lethal glare. "Nothing. I was just leaving." The door was pushed open with an audible squeak.

"Kaaakaaaa-kaaakaaaa!" shrieked the child.

"Neeehh Naru-chan, stop squirming from mama." A sigh. "Kakashi-kun…"

"Bye Kushina-san. Naru-chan. _Hokage-sama_."

"Mmm…Forget about my wayward student, Naru-chan –" A startlingly bright grin lit the room. "– and say papa."

"Kaka?"

"No-no. Papa."

"Kaka." Mama Kushina's sweet little dumpling was now '_wibbling_'.

"Papa, Naru-chan."

Oh. And are those tears? Why yes, they are. "Kakaaa. Maaamaaa. Riiii."

"Hush now my dearest pea; it's going to be alright. You just really wanted a hug from your Kakashi-nii before he left, neh?" A warning tone. "Min-chan…"

"Fine..." One pout later and a command was given. "Hey! Get Hatake Kakashi back in here immediately, will you?"

Moments later, a ruffled ninja stood at the doorway. "I do not appreciate being manhandled by your ANBU guards, _Hokage-sama_."

"So cold, _Kaka-chan_."

"Minato be nice."

"Yes, Kushina." The Hokage actually looked contrite.

A deeper sigh this time. "What do you want, Minato-sensei?"

"Where are you off to in such a hurry?"

"I left something at the hospital with Rin and need to retrieve it."

"Rii?"

"That's right, Naru-chan, Rin! Now how about papa?"

"Riiii!" The baby clapped joyously. The father's face faulted.

"If that's all you need to know, I'll take my leave now…"

"Wait, Kakashi-kun, Naru-rabbit wants to give you a hug."

The utter silence from Kaka-nii punctuated the room.

"Well? Aren't you going to hold him?"

An uneasy shuffle followed by an awkward quiet.

"It's not as if you've never held him before, Kakashi-chan."

There was no smart-ass rebuttal just a, 'Naruto drools a lot'.

Mama Kushina snorted gaily, "Don't wimp out on me, Kakashi-kun." The baby reached forwards and latched onto Kaka-nii like a leech.

"Kakaaa!"

There was a very pronounced cringe as warm, viscous liquid slid down his shoulder. "R-Right. Thank you for the hug Naru-chan."

"Kaka baiii!" One sloppy kiss (that missed his jaw and instead landed in his ear) later, Kaka-nii left, leaving precious Naru-chan in his papa's arms.

"Gugugu…" came the pleased gurgled noise.

"Oh what am I going to do with you, Naru-chan?"

"How about feed him, dear?" Kushina tossed the warmed bottle and Minato caught it. "And maybe a nap too…Wouldn't you like that my honey bee?"

The baby cooed 'mama' and ate greedily. Minato sat down with his child. "Do you like the bottle that _papa_ is feeding you?"

Soft sunlight smiles and caresses and Kushina left the nursery. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

A familiar, beaming smile. "Mama?"

"Mmm you hear that, Naru-chan? Your mama will be back, but until then it will just be the two of us. Papa and Naru-chan."

Another pleasant gurgle and wide sky-blue eyes stared at the matching pair hovering above him.

"Now you have to finish your bottle, or else your mama will skin me alive."

The baby giggled and drooled. "Mama!"

"Yup. Mama. Papa. Naru-chan. We're a family."

"Mama…" The baby wrinkled his nose. "Glluuugugu…Pa…pa?"

There was an extremely long, ecstatic shriek – a shriek so loud that later half of Konoha claimed they heard. Almost immediately, Kushina along with the ANBU guards rushed into the room, beyond alarmed.

"Minato! What's going on?"

"N-Naru-chan, say it again!"

The baby clapped gleefully and babbled incoherently.

"…Minato…" Several blinks of bewilderment followed.

"Kushina! Kushina, Naru-chan finally said papa," beamed the proud father. "He finally said it!"

"Really?" Delighted, mama Kushina cooed, "Is that right Naru-chan?"

"Mama!"

"Did you hear my loyal ANBU guards? My little Naru-chan said papa!"

The guards exchanged looks with Kushina just as she mouthed, 'stress'.

A fond smile danced across Minato's lips - oblivious to the ill-placed concern - his eyes and attention solely focused on the bundle cradled in his arms. "Nehh…Naru-chan, say papa again?"

With baited anticipation, he waited. The child gurgled, "…Mama?"

Muffled giggles were sharply controlled after the Hokage glared at his audience.

"Nooo. It's papa, Naru-chan. Pa-pa."

"Mama! Kaka!"

"Papa," enunciated the father.

"Kaka! Rii!" The baby pouted and added, "Bai?"

"Pa-pa. Papa. Repeat after me. Papa."

The baby looked vaguely confused and upset.

A delicate smile. "It's alright, Min-chan. How about you go get some rest and I'll handle our little fishcake here."

"But-But-!"

Mama Kushina took her baby into her arms and nodded curtly at the ANBU guards. "Make sure the Hokage rests."

"But Kushina! Naruto-!"

"Now, Minato." A steady glare was directed towards the Hokage.

The blond looked nervous. The ANBU guards suddenly understood all too well who actually wore the pants in _this_ relationship.

"Alright Kushina…You win." A despondent sigh. "I'll see you later Naru-chan."

A cheerful trill. "Papa baiiii!"

--

**End  
**

Spyrit


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